Monthly Archives: July 2014

James Byron (The Voice UK 2014) Review


It was lovely to catch up with James, its been a long time since I’ve seen him to chat too or watch live and I cannot wait to catch up with him again…. if I can get my flash working I may even try and set up a photo shoot 😀

On to the review….

(OH almost forgot!! James was supporting Mark Gardner (hope I’ve spelt that right) at Mama Lizs Voodoo Lounge on 31st July 2014 in Stamford, Lincolnshire, UK.  Shout out to Michael who runs the Voodoo Lounge and does a damned good job of it!)

Continue reading James Byron (The Voice UK 2014) Review

So Excite!

i’m feeling happy and excited.  genuine happiness that i haven’t felt for a long time

firstly, i’ve finally got my meds sorted out.  the dose at least.  i have 200mg three times a day which currently consists of 12 tablets a day.  four tablets three times a day.  i called up to put in a repeat prescription today and got told “but you only ordered these last week…..” well yes, because of the amount i have to take in one go, a box of pregabalin is only lasting me a week….. i had to wait for the doctor to call me to change the amount of tablets i take in one go (they’re only 50mg tablets) to one single 200mg tablet before i could call in and get my prescription ordered.

Continue reading So Excite!

Blogging process and…..boobs

I know it doesn’t seem like it, but I do actually have a blogging process.  Sadly it’s nothing that I specifically do myself.  Usually it happens at around midnight or sometimes 2am and my voices (who I shall, from hereon out refer to as “the choir”) go something like this….

TheChoir: you know you wanna blog
Me: yes, yes I do…..
TC: and you have a subject…. something to blog about…
Me: yes, I do….
TC: so blog
Me: it’s 2am…. I want to sleep
TC: tough, if you don’t blog about this subject right now….. we won’t let you sleep
Me: Bastards
TC: damn straight…

Continue reading Blogging process and…..boobs

Let’s Talk About Sex (Baby)

I know that probably 99% of my readers will be of the age that they take not bullshit about sex and sexual health.  However there is that 1% that still think they either know it all or have already been given the correct information from friends and sometimes family.

In the following post, I won’t name names.  That’s not what this is for in any way.  It’s sort of an open ended question that’s bee running through my head for a good long while now.

So read on and find out just wtf I am talking about….

Continue reading Let’s Talk About Sex (Baby)

June 21st 2014 GIG REVIEW


i am ridiculously sorry for not being able to upload pictures and videos from the gig.  if you keep up with my twitter you’ll know i still have major laptop issues and how i even managed to get it to boot up but here we are.  click after the break to read the review of the gig!  

again im sorry to all bands for how late this is and i didnt get many GREAT pictures because i’m still trying to figure out what’s going on with the flash on my camera.

Continue reading June 21st 2014 GIG REVIEW

Bathing suit shopping is no longer fun

Okay so picture the scene…. you’re going on holiday and you need a bathing suit of some kind cuz, sun and pools etc.  Only problem is, you’re plus size and you’re kinda self conscious about your stomach even though generally you’re pretty body positive.

You think, “how hard can it be?” 

Read on to find out……. Continue reading Bathing suit shopping is no longer fun

An actual blog

It’s been a while since I actually did a proper blog and I thought I would take the time to do so.

I did do a full proper vlog and it was just shy of an hour long. A lot of it was rambling but I talked about voices (in my head) and depression and such and when I went to piece it all together (I did it in three parts) it got corrupted and decided to completely fuck up. So I will try my best to remember everything I had put in to it and write it here 😀

Can’t promise though. I am currently coughing up my seventh or eighth lung, my head is spinning and can’t even remember if I’ve taken my meds today so I darent take them now, in case I have already taken them.  I’ve been like this for a week but I’ve been trying so hard to just carry on and now, finally, it’s kinda hitting me hard.

So…. where to start? Well I no longer have brightly coloured hair – it’s now back to brunette. Actually feel quite comfortable with it, which is weird in itself.

Went on a bit of a shopping spree this past week, got myself some stuff from primark (I love that place) though I do have a small issue.  Their clothes sizes (I’m talking about womens) go up to an 18-20, yay!  However their biggest bra is a 38DD (I’m an F cup now), and their awesome batman, superman, spongebob, marvel….actually all their knickers, thongs and girl shorts only go up to a 14-16.  WTF Primark?  Women do come in bigger sizes than that (as evidenced by your 18-20 clothing) and by gods we like to wear batman panties too…..with matching bra!

And on the subject of bras…. since why are they so fucking expensive?  I got a gorge new bra (and matching knickers) from ann summers, mainly because a) I needed to be fitted and b) they had a sale on…. £12 for matching bra/knicker set.  Yes yes yes,  I had to go on ebay to find another couple of bras because no matter where I went they were ridic expensive.  The smaller ones (from training bras to about a C/D cup) were quite reasonably priced, then you get the DD, E, F….and suddenly they’re £35 each!!! WHAT THE FUCK?  I’m 90% sure someone would pay me £35 to walk around holding my breasts and by gods they would be happy to do so.

Anyway…  for the first time in a while, I have NOTHING planned for the coming week which is fantastic and I am gonna chill, play xbox and sleep a lot. 

Think I’m gonna go watch youtube now….. my brain isn’t letting me have information to type. Bad brain. Very bad brain.

Open letter.

the time has come (and it has been coming) to actually tell you to fuck off and leave me alone. I’ve been polite, i’ve been honest with you yet you continue to sexually harrass me (and yes, that is what it is). 

The last time anything was said about the comments you pass you brushed it off as “just a joke” and “can’t a man pay you a compliment anymore?”  It is NOT a joke to tell someone “me and thee really need to give that a go sometime, just for the innevitable lulz afterwards” and it is not paying someone a compliment when you ask to see my tits on a regular basis.

It makes me uncomfortable, and i laugh it off because as you keep saying “im a spacker” Well you need to stop using that as a damned excuse because it isnt one.  I do know other people with aspergers and none of them act the way you do and none of them use it as an excuse to say whatever the fuck they want.

OK so yes, my parents banned you from the house and from visiting. This is because not only did you disrespect them by not saying goodbye and thank you for having me/feeding me (and dont even start on saying this was because you were having a “spacker attack” – its basic fucking manners and aspergers does not stop you from having them), but also because you once more asked me if there was a chance for “us” (there is no us, ever was an us and never would be an us) AND THEN presumed it was okay for you to ask me if you could grab my tits.  Dad heard that FYI and he was not happy.  It is never okay for you to ask someone if you can touch their tata’s. Ever. And i would not ever invite you to do so.

Moving on (if you’re still reading and you’d better be) PCOS….. just because i MAY have PCOS this does not in any way shape or form change my sexual preferences.  Yes there is a hormone imbalance which goes with it but this does not automatically determine that we are all lesbians.  I know women with PCOS who are as straight as a pole and are on no medication to “Correct” the imbalance.  So, in short and to be blut, just because i dont want on your dick doesnt mean i dont want on any dick – that applies to any female BTW.

OH and by the by…. yes i do have a “type” and generally yes, tattoos and piercings.  However i also go for a good personality and i am not sorry to say that ain’t yours.  You ARE racist and that really pisses me off because i really dont give a shit about anyone’s colour or religion or whatever and neither should you.  You treat racism as a joke.  It is not a joke.  I also think you treat feminism as a joke too. You tar all feminists as “tumblr feminazis” And then dont understand why i get annoyed or go quiet. Yes there are extreme feminists out there but we arent all the same.  Generally feminists just want equality (shock horror) and that leads me nicely into something that happened a while back….. when i was still with koren and you told that “pervert” (*coughkettleblackcough*) you were my boyfriend because apparently he would respect that more than if you had said i had a girlfriend or was single…. you shoulda just pointed me in his direction and i woulda happily told him where to go.  I am not a helpless damsel in distress and more importantly i am not YOUR damsel in distress.

And do you have ANY idea how awkward it was when you changed your relationship status “as a joke” to say you and me were together?  I have mutual friends with Koren who saw that and i had to explain to them that no, it was just a joke (on your part) and no offence was meant. Even Koren was pissed off. We hadnt even been split up a month when you did that and it was very disrespectful to ME.

As such, on the subject of Koren, she is my FRIEND one of my BEST FRIENDS and of course if i’m creeped out by something i’m gonna tell her that isn’t breaking a trust in friendship its actually have friends i can talk to about this kinda shit.  I dont care how many times you say “oh she let you down….. i knew it wouldnt last…. i dont see why you dont tell her where to go…” it’s not gonna stop me from having feelings and loving her (even if that is just as a friend).  And NO i did not like the idea of you “fucking Koren”.  She is my ex and it made me very uncomfortable.  Not because she is my ex, but because of YOU.

Note: telling someone who is bi, lesbian or whatevers that all they need is “a good fucking” to “turn them onto the dick” is disgraceful.

Now….how to say the next part…. grow the fuck up. You dont like your life? Change the fucker. If you “cant” it means you dont want too and are just happy moaning about it. You’re on the sick?  Why? Even if you do have fibromyalgia it doesnt mean you CANT work, it means you have to find a job that works for you.

My final note on all this…’re fucking creepy and you scare me. Telling me you want to give me an orgasm and it would make you a happy bunny…. wtf dude? I’ve told you many times that NO it will not happen and you going on and on about it is not going to wear me down, it is not going to make me change my mind about you in fact it just reinforces that to be honest, i’m starting to question whether you are innocent of rape and even if you are, how you act and talk to me makes you DANGEROUS.

In short…… leave me alone.  I am about to block you on EVERYTHING, dont text or call or email. If you dont listen, i have screencaptures of everything thats freaked me out and i will go the legal route.

Side note: im sending this in email not because i have no backbone but so there is a damned record of it, so that you cant just switch the webcam off or log out.  And just to make sure that you KNOW i am serious, this is going on my personal blog.