I am so fkn done

I went to the bank today to talk about an overdraft.  Long story short it was turned down because I’ve already been overdrawn on a basic bank account.

As it stands, my “business” is doing shit and I have no way of getting a “normal” 9-5 because of my fibromyalgia making that impossible…. i’d drop everything, if I could even lift it in the first place…. I couldn’t be on my feet all day, or my ass, I can’t do office work because a) id be sat down b) i’d be sat staring at a screen all day (HELLOOOO SIEZURES) and c) I’m dyslexic! I’ve already been told I can’t do computer work or till work.  I absolutely HATE talking to people so customer service iS A NO GO!!

I am out of options.

I have an ATOS assessment tomorrow….. fuck sake. I walked up from town today (3/4 mile – 1 mile) using my stick mind you.  Took me a good twenty – thirty minutes to get up and I was in AGONY by the end of it. I’m now sat on my bed close to sobbing cuz everything is fucking up.  I don’t know what the hell I can do now.  I have no idea how to get completely written off as disabled but if I do it means no more photoshoots and no more going to gigs….. which fucks me over even more.

I just…..I’m done. I don’t know what to do with my life, I have no direction and even if I had……. fuck knows what i’d do or be able to do.

Fuck.

I have a friend with me right know…..his name is jack and he’s rather smooth.  Ol’ No. 7.  

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