Anxiety – an unpopular opinion

Seems to me like anxiety is the new bisexual.

Couple of years ago everyone was bisexual (and I’m not talking bicurious cuz I think everyone goes through that at some point) I mean full on bisexual.  It was the “cool” or “in” thing to be.

I think anxiety is now the cool or in thing to be.  Everyone is self diagnosing with anxiety.

Just because you feel sick with anxiety every now and again doesn’t mean you have an anxiety disorder. Everyone gets that, it’s normal. It’s part of life.

Having an anxiety disorder is like living in hell because you feel anxiety about the most stupid little things.

An personal example…. There are certain types of movie I cannot watch.  Interstellar is a great example….do you know why? I have a full on anxiety attack about the prospect of being stuck in space, floating around and running out of oxygen.  Why do I have these thoughts and the ensuing anxiety attack? I have absolutely no idea.

Today I forgot my bus pass and had to stop myself from having an anxiety attack about that…. Why did i suddenly feel anxious….No clue.

I have a fear of death….sure, most people do.  However I wake up at 2am and have an anxiety attack so bad that to get back to sleep I have to double up on my meds.

Talking in front of a crowd? Hell no. The amount of shit that could go wrong?? Fuck that.  
Making new friends? Rarely. I don’t like being around New people when I’m not with someone I know. 
Fun fact; I suck at parties because I will sit with a bottle of Jack in a corner and drink it silently while everyone else is enjoying themselves. 
My social anxiety is ridiculous and has kept me in the house for days at a time (my record is two months straight without leaving the house).

And let’s not start on the really ridiculous stuff….. Getting off at the wrong train or bus stop.  Using the wrong toothbrush.  Not getting to an appointment on time or too late.  Not being able to find where I’m going. Animal and child abuse on programmes or the internet. 

Travelling to a new place  btw…..takes WEEKS of planning. No joke. And if I don’t know where I’m going when I get there then that adds a whole new level to it. I have been known to break down in the middle of gods know where and rock back and forth, hands over my ears with my head buried in my knees. 

I hyperventilate, I throw up, I cry, I scream, I throw up some more, I rock, I shiver, I sway, my skin crawls and I feel like I want to rip it off, I pant, I Fucking pass out…. And when they’re REALLY bad….. I have seizures.

So don’t sit there and tell me you have an anxiety disorder.  Don’t self diagnose yourself.  Don’t say it just because your friends “have it”. 

It’s not cool or cute.  What the fuck seems cute about it to you?! The throwing up? Or is it the incoherant babbling or trying to explain something to a complete stranger in a town/city you’ve never been too? Or maybe it’s the wailing like a three year old and curling yourself up trying to be small so nobody notices you….?  Because as much as you want to reach out for help that is the last thing you want to do because….. Social anxiety.

Get it in to your heads that ANXIETY IS NOT CUTE!

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