I dunno how I feel.
I wanna scream, laugh, cry and sit in a corner hugging a bottle of JD.
I feel numb but I feel like all my nerves are on edge at the same time.
I’m gonna watch my gran die…. And I don’t know how I’m gonna be able to take that mentally.
I don’t remember much about when my gramps died. I remember seeing him in hospital and he had an oxygen mask on…. I said he looked like an elephant and he didn’t even have the strength to laugh or smile.
I guess I’m scared of gran just giving up. I want her suffering to end; watching her breathless is terrifying.
But I always thought she was gonna live forever. Stupid I know.
This will all make sense when tomorrow’s post goes out.