I’m staring blanky at the page and i have no clue where to even start with this blog so… It may jump around but, right now that’s what my brain is like.
Gran has lost the plot and her marbles are starting to scatter at an alarming rate. You cant hold a conversation with her because what you say and what she hears, aren’t in sync.
You’ll ask her a question and she wont recognise it as such, she’ll see it as you answering her and respond in kind.
She says she’s received letters for appointments and swears blind that she’s seen a doctor and has been told “X, Y, Z”. In truth most of it is Kath has been to a doctor and has been told to stay away from certain foods and such. But gran is convinced its her and woe betide anyone who says otherwise.
It’s… So frustrating…. Because even a year ago, she was all there. Quick as anything, great sense of humour. Yet now, she makes jokes but they make no sense, she always has to be right… And if we try and tell her no, you need to to A,B,C… We’re the ones that have to be right. She does act like a petulant child who isn’t getting her way.
She’s holding it against mum that she put her in respite care for two weeks because i was having major trouble mentally dealing with gran. I felt like a glorified slave and was treated as such…. However it’s “all mum’s fault”. Which is bull shit.
We have tried to tell gran whats going on with my health. My liver is so close to not working its scary. I see the specialist next month and we go from there. She doesn’t understand how dangerous this is and what it means…. She doesn’t get that we still need to pack up the house and still expects mum to go round every day for at least two hours sometimes longer and still has her doing a load of work so mum comes home feeling mentally and physically drained.
Gran just doesn’t get it and the more we tell her the more she gets pissed off at us. I don’t know how often i will see her now… It breaks my heart to see my gran this way. The hardest part is gran knows she’s losing it. I wish she didn’t know. It would be easier for her.