Tag Archives: depression

An Apology to #MattLucas

Dear Mr. M. Lucas,

This is long overdue and has been playing on my mind a lot recently. I made similar posts on former blogs before now, hoping you'd see them… and now I hope you haven't because I distinctly remember trying to justify myself.

There is no justification for the disgraceful and heartless "joke" I reposted on Twitter many years ago about yourself and your late husband.

For the longest time I would shrug it off by saying I didn't ever think you would see it, didn't know it was the real you replying and some other ridiculous excuses to make myself feel better.
The truth is none of that matters or makes it better and I should never have posted it in the first place. I was cocky, idiotic and cold hearted…. please know, I am no longer that person. I now take issues such as depression, self harm and suicide very seriously and know they are never a joke and shouldn't ever be any form of entertainment. I should have known back then and obviously I didn't.

I made an insurmountable mistake and royally fucked up and I cannot begin to imagine the hurt seeing that tweet caused you. With everything within me, I apologise unreservedly.

I hope you do see this and please know, that this mistake has not & will not be repeated. Ever.

I'm not looking for forgiveness; only for you to know that I want to be as far away as possible from the person I was back then. I have grown and matured through experiences I wouldn't ever wish on anyone, and I am ashamed of myself for what I posted.

I am so very sorry.

Yours Sincerely
Miss K.P. Hall. (Twitter: @KatVonHall )

Note: I can't remember the Twitter name I was using back then. I do know I deleted the account when I started a new one.

how PokemonGo is helping me battle depression.

OK so imma add in a little background info about just why im so excited about PokemonGo.

If you’re new to my blog – I have depression, borderline personality, bipolar and depression.


when pokemon first came out, we didn’t have the money for the handheld or the games.  they were just far too expensive, so while everyone was playing the card game or the Gameboy, I had a sega mega drive (which I absolutely loved, it was my first gaming console).

Continue reading how PokemonGo is helping me battle depression.

Euch. An update.

Euch…. Just kinda explains everything im feeling right now.

🚩 Big ass trigger warnings ahead for angst, suicide and self harm. 🚩

Gran fell on Thursday the 9th and ended up cracking her head (and actually fracturing her skull) which resulted in a bleed on the brain. 

She was trying to hammer in a screw  cup-hook into a plastic door frame using a metal meat tenderiser. She got dizzy and down she went.

Continue reading Euch. An update.

I need a Vacation

No word of a lie.

I have mental health issues and I’m an empath. So with everything going in around here I’m at breaking point.

image

Two days ago I had a mini melt down and it all started because I tried to change my septum and it all fucked up and I lost the piercing. 

Cue me having a meltdown and sobbing uncontrollably against my mum.

Continue reading I need a Vacation

TW: depression/self harm. (Had an emergency mental health assessment)

Due to the current issues I was sent for a mental health assessment on emergency.  I’ve already been  diagnosed with borderline personality disorder and now it seems I’m on the bipolar scale and my anxiety is back.

Continue reading TW: depression/self harm. (Had an emergency mental health assessment)

well fuck

you know when you’re told something but it isnt until you actually say it out loud yourself that it takes full effect?

i had a moment like that today and some very hard realities hit home.

1) my anti depressants arent working.  not properly anyway.  problem is before i can be put on anything else, i have to be weened off of these (i take three different happy pills), but i have to be off of ALL three of them before i can start new ones.  i know for a fact that once i start coming off them….my world will turn upside down and i will be the hardest person to live with…. not only this but i know i’ll be self harming and suicidal once again.  i know that my family and true friends will stick by me but….. im terrified if im not stable….i’ll lose my girlfriend….because if i can’t deal with me off my meds….who will?

Continue reading well fuck

June Update

Jesus christ I am terrible at this weekly blogging thing.  I am so fucking sorry.

A lot has happened over the last few weeks and there’s much of it I can’t talk about due to respecting my family’s wishes and keeping it off the net.  Let’s just say I’m gonna book another nervous break down (the last one was a few years ago) and I will sit in a corner crying, laughing and drinking and probably smoking as much as I fucking can.

Read on for more stuffs…

Continue reading June Update