Dear Mr. M. Lucas,
This is long overdue and has been playing on my mind a lot recently. I made similar posts on former blogs before now, hoping you'd see them… and now I hope you haven't because I distinctly remember trying to justify myself.
There is no justification for the disgraceful and heartless "joke" I reposted on Twitter many years ago about yourself and your late husband.
For the longest time I would shrug it off by saying I didn't ever think you would see it, didn't know it was the real you replying and some other ridiculous excuses to make myself feel better.
The truth is none of that matters or makes it better and I should never have posted it in the first place. I was cocky, idiotic and cold hearted…. please know, I am no longer that person. I now take issues such as depression, self harm and suicide very seriously and know they are never a joke and shouldn't ever be any form of entertainment. I should have known back then and obviously I didn't.
I made an insurmountable mistake and royally fucked up and I cannot begin to imagine the hurt seeing that tweet caused you. With everything within me, I apologise unreservedly.
I hope you do see this and please know, that this mistake has not & will not be repeated. Ever.
I'm not looking for forgiveness; only for you to know that I want to be as far away as possible from the person I was back then. I have grown and matured through experiences I wouldn't ever wish on anyone, and I am ashamed of myself for what I posted.
I am so very sorry.
Miss K.P. Hall. (Twitter: @KatVonHall )
Note: I can't remember the Twitter name I was using back then. I do know I deleted the account when I started a new one.
Ah… it’s a chronic illness blog – I’m gonna class this in my Fibro Updates tag, however this whole blog applies to every single chronic illness out there (I see you spoonies. I see you.)
Read on…. it may be a long one… I like to be thorough.
Continue reading Don’t Say These Things
I’ve actually been wanting to do this blog for a while and I’ve never really been able to put into words what it’s like.
After today I think I have the descriptions down. And yes….. this will get VERY VERY TMI.
Continue reading TMI – FMS things no-one talks about
It has been a long time since my last update and I’ve had to wait to post anything.
So read on if you’re interested.
Continue reading Update
Ok so once more I apologise for not updating recently myself and my parents haven’t been well and we’re still recovering.
So last week I saw the doctor and we talked about snap, crackle and pop.
Continue reading An update
So within this blog I am going to be painfully honest to the point of upsetting people and sometimes it needs to be done.
If you don’t live with a chronic illness (and for the sake of this blog we shall use fibromyalgia as the example) not try and say you understand what I am going through when even my closest friends and family have no clue what so ever.
Don’t try and liken your illnesses and ailments to what I (and many others) go through on an hourly basis because, without this sounding the way it will, it’s nothing like what I go through.
Continue reading If you don’t live with it….
Yesteday was my grans 79th birthday. Today her long lost son (if you’be seen a uk programme called “long lost families” she was on there – her name is elsie brockbank) and his wife came to see her. They’re a lovely couple, I won’t deny that, I just think we all need to get to know each other better.
Well I went round and the conversation got to aches and pains etc. I said mine weren’t so bad since I got my new memory foam mattress. Kath piped up with “Well just wait till you’re our age an everything will hurt.”
Erm…. excuse me (Kath is grans bff) did you miss the part about my chronic pain illnesses? I refreshed her memory about fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome and rheumatoid arthritis. Triple threat. NEWS FLASH: I ALREADY HURT ALL THE TIME and the fact everyone just brushed over what I had said really pisses me off.
Just wanna say RIP to my cousin Alan, who 9 years ago today took his own life. Never forgotten you.
Below the break is a general open letter. it’s not specifically to any one person.
Continue reading Open Letter