Tag Archives: personal

Life updates and stuff!

So, it’s that time of year again where I sit, or lay, and reflect upon the last year of my life. Thing I’ve done wrong and learned lessons from, things that went incredibly right through nothing but luck (😂) and things that I wish had never happened.

So what am I thinking of? What sticks out? Read on and find out.

Continue reading Life updates and stuff!

Hotel Hell

It’s Sunday, October 1st and we’re much more relaxed than we were yesterday.

I booked us in originally for the Blair Victoria Hotel via amoma.com …. Which I was directed to from Hotels.com. Two nights for £116.47. We arrived after travelling all morning, couldn’t check in till 2pm so we put down our bags and then went to find food; we checked in at 2.30pm ish and crashed on the bed.

Woke an hour ish later and had a good look around…. And were pretty horrified.

This is the bottom of the door to the en suite. I actually slipped while trying to shower because there was no non-slip flooring and then the water pressure messed up meaning hot/cold and back again. So we gave up on that…

Also i dont want water from this to touch me…. Ever.

The above is the extractor fan in the bathroom.

So we complained and we were moved from floor 3, room 26 (6 sets of stairs btw!) To room 40 in the basement. It was bigger with a better bathroom. Upon closer inspection however….

Black Mould incoming. The beds were damp and we couldn’t have the window open or all we could smell was an overflow pipe.

We spent a good four hours trying to find another room, thankfully MIL is amazing and got us into a new hotel at very short notice.

The stupid thing is that the owners of the previous hotel KNOW about the problems they have because they’re “planning a refit next year”.

I’m now gonna have to fight to get a refund from the place i booked it through (who are saying i have to go through my travel agent…..).

Maybe Judge Rinder could help? 😂

OH ALMOST FORGOT!! The Blair Victoria is 2 stars…. The Collier’s Hotel, that we are now in (who are AMAZING) are a 1 star hotel and are SO MUCH BETTER. I swear this is what it feels like to be in The Ritz.

Blood Means Nothing

I will preface this with a CW.

There’s a lot of pent-up anger directed at two family members in this post.

Like… A lot; bordering on rage.

So the entire thing will go behind a cut.

Continue reading Blood Means Nothing

Questioning Beliefs. Is there a God?

It’s not until the hands of death reach for a loved one that we start questioning any of our beliefs… At least that’s what I’ve found about myself.

This blog won’t be for everyone and please know that NONE of what I say is meant to cause offence. I need to get shit off my chest and I feel this is the only way I can do it.

Continue reading Questioning Beliefs. Is there a God?

An Apology to #MattLucas

Dear Mr. M. Lucas,

This is long overdue and has been playing on my mind a lot recently. I made similar posts on former blogs before now, hoping you'd see them… and now I hope you haven't because I distinctly remember trying to justify myself.

There is no justification for the disgraceful and heartless "joke" I reposted on Twitter many years ago about yourself and your late husband.

For the longest time I would shrug it off by saying I didn't ever think you would see it, didn't know it was the real you replying and some other ridiculous excuses to make myself feel better.
The truth is none of that matters or makes it better and I should never have posted it in the first place. I was cocky, idiotic and cold hearted…. please know, I am no longer that person. I now take issues such as depression, self harm and suicide very seriously and know they are never a joke and shouldn't ever be any form of entertainment. I should have known back then and obviously I didn't.

I made an insurmountable mistake and royally fucked up and I cannot begin to imagine the hurt seeing that tweet caused you. With everything within me, I apologise unreservedly.

I hope you do see this and please know, that this mistake has not & will not be repeated. Ever.

I'm not looking for forgiveness; only for you to know that I want to be as far away as possible from the person I was back then. I have grown and matured through experiences I wouldn't ever wish on anyone, and I am ashamed of myself for what I posted.

I am so very sorry.

Yours Sincerely
Miss K.P. Hall. (Twitter: @KatVonHall )

Note: I can't remember the Twitter name I was using back then. I do know I deleted the account when I started a new one.

Not Disabled Enough…?

I haven’t actually written about my disabilities and how they impact my day to day life for a while.  This isn’t because they haven’t been affecting me, but simply because when I’ve passed comments I’ve found that certain areas of the disabled community (and society…. I’ll get there) seem to think it’s a competition of some sort and that some people just aren’t “disabled enough”;  for what exactly I’m not 100% sure.

What I am sure about is that just because I don’t “look disabled” doesn’t mean my disability can be written off or ignored & invalidated and when I say the words “I am disabled”, I shouldn’t have to prove it to anyone.

Continue reading Not Disabled Enough…?

Dear Dementia….

I hate you. I hate you more than anything in the world.

Never again will I hear my gran’s sing song voice; now it’s nothing but a dry rasp.

Never again will I listen to her stories from youth; they’re replaced with mumblings of events that never happened – today we all died in a plane crash and she thought we were ghosts.

Never again will I enjoy her amazing humour and quick wit; it’s now replaced with a confused look that longs for understanding.

Never again will I see her give a warm loving smile and a twinkle in her eyes; instead a vacant expression greets me except for the fleeting moment she recognised me and told me she loved me.

Never again will I hold a conversation about anything; her responses are confused and make no sense.

Never again will I make new memories with her.

There’s so much I want to tell her but she will forget.  I want to share my happiness, my sadness…. But she doesn’t understand.

Dear Dementia; you stole my gran from me and I want her back, so badly.  

Go Fund Me

Hey everyone. 

I’ve been doing some research and sadly the NHS will not supply me with a walking frame that’s fit for purpose.  They’ll only help me with one that is for indoor use only which is no freaking help for me.

They also want their crutches back,  which is sort of fine because they’re two or so inches too short and im usually twisted off to one side using them.

So…. I made a GoFundMe page so I can raise some cash to get myself a decent walking frame that’s gonna last and a set of custom crutches that are long enough for my height.

It’s amazing how the NHS are all about helping until you desperately need that help,  then suddenly you’re too you and they have no money.  Though they were happy to supply me with a fucking wheelchair.  No.  I want to keep my independence as long as I can.

So here’s the important bit.  I’m aiming to raise £200, it’s enough for me to get what I need.  I don’t want to be greedy.

The link is http://www.gofundme.com/kazmobilitymission if you cant give that’s fine,  all I ask is for you to share my story by sharing the link.

For the newcomers to my blog; I am 29 in March and have a chronic pain condition called fibromyalgia.  I also have arthritis.   Due to both these illnesses I’m stuck in the house without walking aids and I want to be able to get out and about.  I like my independence very much.  

The NHS claim I am too young to get the mobility help I need so I have to buy it all myself.  My parents are doing the best they can but we just can’t afford to get what I need.  

I really hate having to ask for help from people I don’t even know irl but right now,  I have no choice.   Without my crutches I’m stuck and they aren’t very stable if my head spins and I feel faint so for long haul I need my frame.    The one I’m looking at folds up,  has four wheels,  a seat that lifts to reveal a storage compartment and has brakes too.  I’ll try and insert a pic but I’m doing this from my phone so it may not work haha.

I really appreciate whatever help you guys can give me.  I’m gonna do a vlog later today to hit my YouTube followers.

Again the link is http://www.gofundme.com/kazmobilitymission

Thank you.

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