Is it weird that right now, with everything else going on in my life, all I want to do is meet you for coffee and ask you why?
Today we made a tough choice and we said goodbye to my little scoobs as he went into his forever sleep. We buried him him in my grans back garden and he has his own little grave that I can visit.
I walked into my house and collapsed. It’s wrong that he wasn’t there. Isn’t there. Won’t be there again for me to cuddle and fuss and play. He was a little shit but he is my little shit.
I don’t want to be in the house but leaving means coming back to an empty house.
It’s not fair that I won’t get any more memories with him. It’s not fair that tonight if I get any sleep I won’t wake up to him kicking me or even biting me. I won’t wake up to his little face or him standing on me. I don’t get any more chances to show him life isn’t all bad and he’s loved so much.
I hope, wherever he is, he knows how much we all loved and continue to love him and won’t hold it against us when we eventually get another dog.
I miss you, you little shit. Love you. Rest In Peace. I’ll see you in another life but feel free to visit me in the mean time.
Wherever you are, you’re in a better place; you’ll be fit , healthy and whole again.
I know we had our disagreements however I also know you always had my back in life and now death. I love you lots and I wish I had seen you before you died so I could have told you. Deep down I hope you knew.
I always remember my 18th birthday party when you got tipsy (drunk) on sherry or gin. You got up to leave around 8pm and there were balloons in the way. You turned your stick around and you played golf yelling “four”, i pointed out that was only one so you yelled “four” until you had hit four of the balloons. We all laughed and it’s a memory I will treasure.
I giggle when I think of you jokingly threatening grandad with your stick and looking at him over your glasses when he passed a funny comment directed at you. I will also remember fondly the love you had in your eyes for each other.
Grandad is doing okay and I think that’s because you’re still with him, helping him heal. I know you’ll always be with us.
Love you lots Nana. RIP and don’t pinch too many bums where you are. Pace yourself 😀